Starting from bullying and insults in childhood, to hearing taunts and nasty comments about yourself in adult life, being the recipient of constant insults and criticism about yourself can take a toll on your mental and emotional well being. Try you might, to let go of the insults and the times you were told that you didn’t deserve it, a part of you starts to think of it as a reality, a bitter truth.
You start to believe that perhaps all these people were right about you. That you are unworthy, brainless and less superior than others. You might begin to think that these people who are constantly putting you down are in fact your well-wishers and want the best for you. You might even confuse their evil intentions as a means of expressing their affection for you. You might take their mean opinions and think of this as a means of playfully teasing or joking with you.
Regardless of whether you want to acknowledge these abusive people and their nasty opinions about you, the truth is that their constant uncalled for criticism can be detrimental to your mental wellbeing and self-confidence. It’s said that words have the power to hurt you as a sword pierces through flesh. Some of these thoughts can linger in your mind your whole life. A small subset of our population who engages in such abusive behavior are known to suffer from a narcissistic personality disorder. They are by default wired to engage in both physical and verbal abuse.
People who possess this personality type like to think of themselves as superior to others. They are self-proclaimed egocentric individuals that feel entitled to receive the best that life has to offer. They often like to demean others and the lack of empathy and compassion towards other humans makes them the ultimate manipulation masters. They like taking advantage of the individual or the situation to the best of their benefits. Based on the facts above, it is easy to understand how narcissists take advantage of others and the pain and grief they cause in the process.
Some mental health experts state that sometimes perfectly well humans may use the narcissistic trait as a way to hide their vulnerable side from others. This is how these people feel good about themselves by putting others down. Psychology expert C. Randall Colvin has stated that narcissistic individuals like to create imaginary psychological boundaries around their state of mind to preserve that high egocentric perception they have about themselves.
In simple words, these people respond in a hostile manner towards others whenever they feel that society will reject them and threaten their views about themselves. These people rarely respond to negative feedback in a positive manner. Instead of bettering themselves, they seek to point out flaws in others. Narcissists are inherently flawed beings with a twisted mindset and possess unreasonable demeaning perceptions about others. They feed off the negativity and hurt they cause only to feel superior about themselves. In this way, they compensate for their shortcomings by pointing out weaknesses in others.
The only thing to remember here is that it’s them- and not you. The next time you come across someone like this, make sure to always remember your worth.