If you are feeling suffocated by your partner it really does take its toll on you and your perspective of just what the hell is going on in your relationship. Quite simply put you can’t breathe, you have to account for everything you say and do whilst apart and that is not love, that’s an attempt at ownership.
Here are some signs that are undeniable that your partner is suffocating you:
1. They wish to spend every single waking moment with you.
Of course, you want to spend time with them, but not every single waking moment. You want the freedom to spend time with your friends and family too which doesn’t always mean they need to be involved.
If they insist that they tag along too as they don’t want to be apart from you that is a major red flag. It’s not healthy, you need space and time away from them. Worse when they do tag along, they make everyone feel uncomfortable and they keep looking at the watch and telling you it’s time to go.
2. They call and text all the time.
When you do get to spend time apart, they send you a constant flow of text messages and even calls. This really ruins the time you are having with your friends if on a group night out say with old college friends. You don’t need to report what you are doing and you certainly don’t need to report what you ate jeez.
Its embarrassing as those you are with will pick up on it and your good mood is ruined. This is a clear sign they don’t trust you and are jealous that you are out having fun whilst they are at home, it hasn’t even occurred to them that they could have had their own night out, they would rather keep tabs on you.
3. They are way too jealous.
The warning signs of jealousy are already in the two above but they take it to the next level of demanding to know who you are with, what is being talked about, are you discussing them, well you weren’t but this behavior makes you talk to those you are with as a download of ‘shit I’ve got issues brewing here.’
If you are out together and someone of the opposite sex talks to you, they demand to know what was said and they accuse you of being unfaithful, they get angry and perhaps even start a fight. You find yourself getting tired of this as it happens too often.
4. They are stalking your ‘online’ status.
They demand to know who you are talking to as they can see you’re online and as you’re not talking to them you must be cheating. They believe that they are the centre of your world and you should only be talking to them. The kicker is you most likely weren’t even online it’s just your phone searching for the nearest Wi-Fi signal that at the same time shows you online on your social media accounts.
5. They are being too clingy and needy.
They want your full attention 24/7 and that just isn’t possible. They are demanding that you listen to everything they have to say right down to the smallest detail. They will either listen to all you have to say too or ignore and interrupt you, it all depends on their mood and needs at the time.
They will constantly complain to you that you are not giving them what they need, that you are being selfish. They may even pull the ‘I’m sick’ move to stop you going somewhere and demand you stay at home with them.
6. You are making excuses not to spend time with them.
When you find yourself going through all of the above you start finding excuses not to spend time with them as you just need to be away from them just so you can breathe. You want to be just ‘ME’ not a ‘US’ which everyone needs to have in their life, if they try and stop you then you really do have to stand your ground before shit gets out of control.
If you find yourself resorting to lies to get time away, then just accept the relationship is dead and end it before it gets any worse.
If any of this seems all too familiar to you then you need to take a good look at the relationship, you’re in and ask yourself, ‘Is this a relationship or an ownership’?