I’m Not A B*tch! It’s Just My Face Having A Rest!

How many times have we heard the so-called ‘resting bitch face’?

Umm hello! Born with this face duh!

Us females we ‘own’ the bitch face, sorry but we do! For some bizarre reason, females just have that look that immediately puts people on their guard and you can almost hear them saying ‘fuck don’t pick on me’

Couple the resting bitch face with an introverted personality and it is a case of just shoot me now why don’t you.

The truth is we have busy minds, we are reflecting on everything, we are very creative and excellent listeners, but our face like Helen of Troy could launch a 1000 ships.

We are deeply misunderstood people and we have constantly been asked throughout life ‘Are you okay’ by someone nervously and you know what, we are fine but seriously bored of being asked that question.

Having ‘this’ face is a problem for us, bet you didn’t expect us to own up to that, here are a few examples of the problems it causes:

1. When I make new friends, they usually say “At first I thought you did not like me!”

OMFG! The times I’ve heard that, and it’s usually followed by ‘the looks you give could kill’. Who me? Now look I can’t change the way my face is, I don’t do these things on purpose but how about you change your perspective and get to know me first, No? okay then byeee, Yes, great now see the real me. I mean seriously what do you want me to do announce via an infomercial that I like you?

2. People are usually seeing me as “hard-to-read”

I keep my thoughts to myself until I want to speak about them, the same as anyone else, but what can I do when my face is the same all the time?

I can be happy about something and try and convey that and it scares the shit out of people as they think I’m up to something, you can almost hear the cries of ‘fuck she smiled OMG she’s after me.’ Are you surprised we just don’t bother anymore?

3. The meetings are failure

People often assume us with the good ole resting bitch face have no problems being around people, in particular strangers and we never feel intimidated by anyone. This simply isn’t true.

We do feel intimidated by strangers and environments that take us out of our comfort zone, but this is where ‘our face’ can be a bonus, it looks like we give zero fucks, well a girls got to have some perks to being viewed as a bitch.

4. We find it hard making new friends because we are labelled as bitch faced!

People tend not to be willing to give us a chance at being friends with them, they are more comfortable keeping us at arm’s length and even better another country! It isn’t until they become friends with us that they realize how wrong they are, and they tend to become our greatest defenders when someone says, ‘How can you be friends with such a bitch when you’re so nice?’ Hello, we are nice too.

5. Anytime or any day someone will think we are upset with him or her

This one really bugs the hell out of me quite frankly. Just like anyone else we need time alone to recharge our batteries.

We are not upset with you, get over yourself tsk! You should know by now if you piss us off, we will say so.

Yes, there are times my phone goes to voicemail doesn’t everyone have days like that?

I’m resting okay!

6. I always have to explain to people that I’m OK!

Have you any idea how exhausting it is to keep repeating yourself over and over that you are okay. Yes, its nice to be asked but not all the damn time.

Want to ask me something? Great just don’t make it about me, let’s have a conversation where we really get to know each other and maybe set the world to rights over copious amounts of wine, sounds like a good plan to me.

7. If you do not want to look miserable, the effort is so exhausting

Do not be so arrogant as to say to me ‘It wouldn’t hurt if you smiled’ I’ll respond with a ‘fake smile’ that is guaranteed to un-nerve you!

I’ve accepted my face resting and at play, I suggest you do the same, do I talk about your face? No, I don’t so leave my bitch face out of your efforts to make the world a smiley place.

8. People outside of my group of friends think I’m a complete snob

Us resting bitch face girls, we are way more observant than you give us credit for, we miss nothing!

We are well aware of what you think of us, the difference is we don’t care, you have made your decision without so much as speaking to us so why should we invest our precious time trying to change your mind.

What you see as flaws, we see as perks of the face, as we see the real you far quicker than anyone else.

9. Our true emotions pop out when we are involved in something that we are passionate about

When we are passionate about something you will know it big time. We come alive and that includes our face, there is a glow you will have not seen before, and that glow shines brightly.

You can see the stunned looks of people around you that have never before seen you this way as they just expect you to ‘speak bitch’. We can and do ‘speak bitch’ but when it’s something we care about watch out world as we don’t stop talking until we are spent.

With all that said, screw what people think, this is my face, and I love it and me, you don’t have to.

You can either love me or hate me, both works for me.