I used to be one hell of a negative person and just felt well this is how life is supposed to be right?
Wrong! Life isn’t just one negative thought after another, that was my mindset so I gave myself the talking to, you know the one where you literally rip yourself apart and then bit by bit you put yourself back together using positive thoughts and actions.
1. I am not good enough
I would always think I wasn’t good enough. That life was just one rollercoaster ride of emotions after another, it was exhausting. All that self-doubt and pity parties no wonder I had no confidence in myself. The truth is everyone is good enough just in a different way and thank goodness we are all different what a boring world it would be if we were all the same.
I started to school myself each time a doubt crept into my mind, I would tell myself I was worthy, I did matter and that took a long time, I do find myself slipping up on that every now and then, so I just remind myself I am worthy.
2. I can’t do it
I was limiting myself by keeping in my mind ‘I can’t’. ‘I can and I will’ became my mindset after years of telling myself I can’t. No, it wasn’t easy changing my mindset, it’s funny when you stop and think of the word ‘can’t’ how many times it’s used and how many of those around us would say something like ‘You can’t do that’. Well, let me tell you, you and can.
3. I’m not as lucky as other people
What the hell has luck got to do with it? We make our own luck I say. We look at people around us and how they are and live and think how lucky they are, and what a perfect life they have. No one has a perfect life if they tell you they do they are lying and they are lying to themselves the most. Believing that luck only goes to others can be soul destroying, change the word luck to good and work on having good things happen to you and you change how you perceive life.
4. I don’t think I’ll ever
What we think becomes our reality right? The reality of our life is down to interpretation. The only person responsible for your life is you, and life is short so make your life as good as it can be. If you find areas of your life make you unhappy work on changing them. Don’t think you can’t change your life as thinking that will keep to stagnant in the same place living the same way day after day.
5. I should be better than I am
Telling yourself ‘I should be better at this’ or ‘I should be able to handle this’ applies pressure on yourself that you could do well without. We are told from childhood ‘you should’ and it’s a negative context that can have lasting damage. Changing that mindset from ‘I should’ to ‘I can and I will’ makes a massive difference on how you approach things in life, it enables you to deal with challenges that you once would have avoided like the plague.
6. I am not strong enough
I really hate this one, as feeling not strong enough leaves you fighting an emotional and mental battle that makes everything twice as hard, but we all feel we are not strong enough at many points in our lives, and when faced yet again with an ‘I am not strong enough’ moment, take a step back and look how many times you thought that, yet you did survive it as you are living proof of that right now.
7. Nobody cares
Everyone feels this at some point in their lives, some more than others. We have this weird human trait that people just don’t care about us and is it any wonder we think like this when we live in a world where some people are just out for themselves. If you have those kinds of people in your life, ask yourself why they are there, and acknowledge that you can do well without them, change your people and you find that the feeling of nobody cares evaporates along with the people you removed.
8. I am not clever enough
We often feel we are not clever enough, not good enough and that is down to the many self-doubts we mind talk to ourselves through our negative thinking. You’d be surprised at how many people around you view you as highly intelligent and wish they could be more like you. We all have our own gifts and areas where we are not so knowledgeable, work on and use your gifts and learn from those around you for anything you feel you could benefit from learning, its all down to perception, so tell your mind to sit down and take a seat as you’re in control now.
9. If I don’t do well, I am a failure
You can’t be an expert at everything that is impossible. Having high expectations can be very damaging, you put yourself up so high that when you do fail and fall down it wreaks havoc on your state of mind. Find your strengths and work to them, never be afraid to fail at something, because the reality is you haven’t really failed, you’ve learned that something doesn’t work that way and you look for another way.
10. Worst case scenario
We all look at situations and think about what the worst-case scenario could be, and often it never happens. It seems to be human nature to look for the worst. Putting your mindset in a position of yes, that could happen but believing it won’t actually help you if shit gets real and you think ‘damn really’? Focus on the best-case scenario as more often than not whilst you are focusing on the good the negative thoughts fade away.
Negative thinking will undermine your happiness, and it’s down to you to change your mindset and in turn, change your life.