No matter why a relationship ends or how justified the breakup is there’s still going to be a period of being sad, single, and scared of what the future might hold. Knowing how to navigate it can make all the difference. Working through the stages of a failed relationship can be a lot easier if you know exactly how to do it. Here’s how to start again when you’re ready.
1. Embrace the sadness
Being able to embrace your feelings, even the bad ones are important. When a relationship ends you’ll have a lot of negative emotions to deal with. From guilt to shame and everything in between these things are all normal and expected when you go from living sharing your life with someone to having to pick up the pieces alone. Most people will try to push away these unwanted feelings, but emotions will always make themselves be seen and heard. So it’s better to get out ahead of them and handle them. Rather than letting them becomes overwhelming.
2. Let it out
Find your best friends and gather them around. Complain, cry, or just generally vent about the breakup to all the people you love and trust. Talking things through will get it all out of you and it’s important not to bottle up. When you vent, you can let go of things.
3. Take some me-time.
Find a way to take care of yourself. Do the things that make your soul happy. Take time to journal, go to the spa, or even just sitting down and reading a good book. Post-breakup is the best time to pull out all the stops for yourself. Once you put yourself first, it’ll be easier to continue doing so and you’ll think less about the person you used to put your energy into.
4. Reconnect with people you lost touch with during your relationship.
Even during the healthiest relationships, some things just happen inevitably. Like losing people. When you become a couple sometimes people outside the circle end up falling out of touch. If you used to flirt with a particular guy on Instagram all the time when you were single or hang out with people outside of your close-friends circle, pick those people back up. Getting in touch with those you had fallen off with will help.
5. Start a new workout routine.
Endorphins are the world’s best medicine. Working out makes people feel better mentally as well as physically. Even if you kept up with your workout regimen when you were in a relationship, it’s good to throw something new into the mix. The variety will help bring you out of the post-breakup slump and the happy juices will continue to flow.
6. Have a carefree night.
The daily routines in a relationship are what make it so comfortable and wonderful. But it doesn’t always have you out there experiencing new and wild things. The adventurous spur-of-the-moment adventures you used to have may have been put on the back burner for planned stay-at-home movie nights and snacks galore. Do something spontaneous and live like it’s the last night of your life just for one night. It will help reinvigorate and recharge your lust for life.
7. Look at it as a lesson.
The end of a relationship may hurt but it doesn’t have to be all bad. You can learn so much from it and make sure you never make the same mistakes again. It can be difficult to rid yourself of feelings of failure after a relationship ended. Take stock of the time you spent with your ex and take lessons away from what you did, what they did, and how you want to move forward with a potential future love interest. Tough times spawn inner growth, after all. Everything you’ve learned may be exactly what you need to never go through this again.