There are times when I have self-doubt and I feel as if I don’t deserve anything in this world let alone a good life. Even though I have my moments, I still believe that there is someone somewhere made just for me who’ll love me for who I am.
There has to be someone out there who’ll walk into my life and tell me that all my negative thoughts about myself are irrelevant. None of that is true and I’ve been thinking falsely about myself this entire time. He’ll make me realize that all those times that I cried weren’t worth it because a miracle was on its way. He’ll be the person to fall in love with all my imperfection and will love me with all he has without making me feel small and insecure.
Not only will he be my life partner but also my best friend, soulmate and someone who reminds me of my self-worth. He won’t walk into my life trying to fill any voids but to just be there and to accept me as I am. He will know I don’t need him to complete me in any way and that I was doing fine before him too. He’ll know I have my fair share of flaws, but he’ll never point them out or try to fix them. He’ll let me stand up on my own two feet and support me throughout. Him being there right by my side will be the best thing he’ll ever offer me.
While I wait for that man to walk into my life, I will work on myself. I will devote my life to myself and be selfish for a while. I won’t wait for him to come into my life to fix me, make me happy and a better person but I’ll do that all by myself before he comes. I want him to see me as an amazing girl and be astonished by my personality once he sees me. I want him to feel lucky for being able to date me. By the time he comes along, I want to be the best version of myself or at least be close to it. It’ll be hard work, but it’ll all be worth it at the end.
Until the right person finds me, I will tackle all my fears and flaws. By doing that I’ll feel complete even before he comes along. I’ll be proud of all my hard work and I’ll know I’ve worked too hard on myself to not be enough for anyone. I know it’s easier said than done and I know the journey is long or might even be never ending but I know that during this entire process, he’ll be thinking of me – thinking of what I’ll look like, what I’ll be like and what my lips taste like.
I know the feelings are mutual. I know that he can’t wait for me to come into his life and change it just like I can’t. I’ll be so good by the time he meets me that I’ll take him to cloud nine. I’ll be so much more than he had ever imagined me to be. I will sweep him off his feet not only by my charming looks but also by my amazing personality and inner beauty. He won’t get enough of my love and craziness. He’ll be the one to admit that I was someone he’s waited for his entire life. He’ll tell me that he’s thought about me for all those years and tried finding me in other girls before me. He’ll fall in love with my free-spirited personality and once he admits all of this, I’ll be the one in ecstasy. When that day comes, I’ll know my hard work paid off.
I will show my better half off to the entire world and brag about him. In him, I will find the love I once stopped believing in. He’ll be the perfect man for me and that’ll be the last time I’ll ever have to worry about finding the right person for myself.