When you are involved with a narcissist on any level be that a friendship or a relationship all you will hear is ‘Me. Me. Me. Me. Me’ they are nothing but selfish individuals who only look out for their own needs.
Everything is about making their lives better and they really don’t care who they hurt in the process.
They have this ability to portray a perfect life and that you must be a part of it because they want you in it, you are special to them, many have fallen into this trap of a make-believe world.
You never see what is coming at you until it’s too late, you are in too deep and then you see the huge mistake you have made.
Walking away from any involvement with a narcissist is no way as easy as some people think, for they have their claws into you as deep as can be.
You are full of emotions and you have developed feelings for this person and you can’t just shut those emotions and feelings down as they are real unlike what the narcissist has claimed to have, their feelings for you are not real and that is why it is so easy for them to walk away once you have served your purpose.
As humans full of hormones, emotions and feelings we often tend to give people second chances, hell lets be honest some of us give untold amounts of chances to people that truly don’t deserve them, we keep hoping they will change for the better.
They have been wearing a mask the whole time that you have been getting pulled in, but like any lie or charade it won’t last forever and eventually, the mask falls off and the reality of your situation begins to sink in.
They use many tactics to drive you away, this is done so all the blame can be firmly placed on your shoulder. When they see that their never-ending circle of abuse has been seen for what it is, they start doing things to drive you away.
1. They lack empathy
They will never look at anything from your perspective, they will start to belittle you, embarrass you in public and laugh at you the whole time whilst doing so. What they often lack to notice is they are laughing alone as no one is finding them amusing least of all you, but they continue showing this lack of empathy towards you as it simply amuses them to do so.
2. They gaslight you
They will convince you or at least try to that what you are saying they have said or done isn’t true. They will claim that you are being too sensitive, that you need to grow up and get real. They will even try to convince you that you are losing your mind, trust me you are not.
3. They are paranoid
A typical trait of a narcissist is paranoia and that is when shit gets real as they believe you are out to get them and they will do as much damage to you as they possibly can. You are now the enemy and for them, all bets are off you are now the target of their smear campaign.
4. They don’t know how to communicate
Narcissists for all their smooth talking and charm really have no idea how to communicate, the only communication they know is through lies and they tell plenty of them. If they feel they are not winning with you they become aggressive, blame you for anything and in some cases violent towards you.
5. They are selfish
They tend to lay any relationship issues firmly at your door, they may claim they love you but can’t be with you and you make them miserable, that is yet again another tactic to leave you feeling totally at fault for why the relationship has ended. They may even claim they feel lonely in the relationship; they have pulled that out of the air as a final insult to you, but it does the damage it was intended to do.
How long you stay is totally in your hands, but to be honest once these mind games start you know deep down, they are on the move, stop the crap they are pulling and leave on your terms, empower yourself as only you can.