Narcissists approach their assault on their victims like a general approaches war. They strategize and anticipate every move their foe may make.
Below are some classic tactics they use.
1. A narcissist threatens you to intimidate you. They want you to stop thinking for yourself and only listen to what they have to say.
2. They will pull you up on some imaginary mistreatment by someone yet it is them that are mistreating you.
3. They give you compliments when you least expect it and it takes you off balance and makes you suspicious of what will come next.
4. Should you be successful they will do all they can to sabotage you, they can’t handle you being more successful than they are, as far as they are concerned everyone is worthless except them.
5. They appear perfect, flawless and successful, but this is all an illusion as what they are projecting is what you are and they are stealing your identity.
6. They will do whatever it takes to keep up their perfect image and that includes crushing anyone in their path.
7. Should you find yourself having a problem they sit back and watch you struggle through and once you solve it they then tell you that you did an awful job of fixing it and that they could have done it better.
8. You are not an individual, to them you are an extension of them and are there to do what they want.
9. They instil fear into you as soon as they can, as fear is how they control you.
10. Everything that goes wrong will be your fault, they will lay the blame at your door and that you are too sensitive to handle real life.
11. Every narcissist views any weakness in a person as a major fault, they will use it against you at every opportunity.
12. They ooze confidence as they are far too arrogant to think otherwise.
13. They will hold your past against you and bring it up at any opportunity especially if they want to lay a guilt trip on you.
14. They will make things go wrong in your life intentionally just so they can sweep in and save the day and make themselves look good.
15. They will cause you pain on purpose all planned out of course, and then they will play mind games to soothe the trouble over and leave you feeling you have over-reacted.
16. They will use every public event you both attend to humiliate you as its fun for them to do.
17. They will destroy everything that is precious to you.
18. They will constantly threaten to leave you as they want to hear you beg them to stay, they have convinced you that you can’t live without them.
19. They will convince you that you are unlovable to keep control over you.
20. They will verbally abuse you at every opportunity.
21. Your entire relationship is one of control, their control.
22. If you suddenly become aware of just what your relationship is, they will become more aggressive in their behavior towards you, just so you stay out of fear.
23. They set a trap in their web of deceit and once trapped it is hard to get out.
24. They give their version of love and take it away just as easily.
25. They will control all the finances even if you have your own job, they will insist on joint checking accounts and then without warning move the money into another account or even remove you from the account.
In the end, their victims become emotionally beaten and no longer able to feed the narcissists needs. When this happens they leave and move on to their next victim leaving behind damage that takes time to recover from.